Diegesis

by Diego Clare

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about

Diegesis was self-released in August 2014. It was recorded one week in Spring 2013 at Another Recording Company (home to Saddle Creek Records) in Omaha, Nebraska. Produced by Gary Gold and co-produced by Cursive frontman Tim Kasher, the album features members of Cursive, Desaparecidos, The Faint, American Football, The Good Life, Tilly and the Wall, and more.

credits

released August 12, 2014

Recorded at ARC (Omaha, NE) & NYN Studios (Nashville, TN)
Engineered by AJ Mogis and Gary Gold
Produced/Mixed/Mastered by Gary Gold
Co-Produced by Tim Kasher

Made with the undying support of Richard Arlook

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license

all rights reserved

about

Diego Clare Brooklyn, New York

Singer-songwriter from Encino, California, currently living in Brooklyn, New York.

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Track Name: Many Faces
I have many faces
And darling here's one:
Pick it up and put it down,
Spin it all the way around--
Is there a center?

You spun me like a compass,
But you'll never know your way around
Without a reference

Birds in flapping clusters swim like shadows on a wall;
One mind, one single-celled impromptu game of call and response

I'm looking for what's timeless
Out of the corner of my eye,
Beyond the borders of my sight,
But not my mind

Ahh-la-la-la light to dark is the same
Until you give it a name and root it up,
Pull it out of the ground--
What have you found?

Birds in flapping clusters swim like shadows on a wall;
One mind, one single-celled impromptu game of call and response

I'm burrowing through concrete on the railway
A million pairs of conscious eyes
None of them can realize me,
The essence of me,
Behind the faces they see;
We're all just a bunch of little universes
Woven up in space and time
Track Name: Every Night (Must I Wait?)
Every night
The black pools in your eyes
Harboring life
Swing a light

Like a lasso on a pulse
Like a lasso on a pulse
Like a lasso

Every night
The black pools in your eyes
Harboring life
Swing a light

Like a lasso on a pulse
Like a lasso on a pulse
Like a lasso

You're luring me in
I'm bug-eyed and thin;
A winged moth to a bulb!

Must I wait?
Must I wait?
For you to blink again
For you to blink again
Track Name: Bridesmaid
How dare you?
How dare you?
They were your only friends
They were your only friends

How could you?
How could you?
Together we saw them wed
Cried at the vows they read

Bridesmaid, Bridesmaid,
Bridesmaid my ass

Laying in bed
Undressed, conscious
Of all your transgressions
Quickly silence them

He pinned you
He pinned you
Said, 'This one will bring you love'
Something you'd know little of

Bridesmaid, Bridesmaid,
Bridesmaid my ass

Arms outstretched
Who knew you'd catch it?
Pretty silver garter
Wear it for good luck

Never underestimate someone
The truth is you don't know what they're capable of

Never underestimate someone
The truth is you don't know what they're capable of

How dare you?
How dare you?
Track Name: You'll Never Know
Oh, you'll never know
Just how much pain you've caused
Just what kind of guy you lost

But if you're gonna go,
Go ahead and go
Please leave behind my winter coat
And take with you this string of notes

Around your neck it goes
‘Cause every time I sat and wrote
Thoughts of you would choke me up
'til every phrase had gone corrupt

So now you'll never know
How this tune was supposed to go
How my universe conspired to know
All about the seed you'd never sow

So many things we'll never know
Get used to it
It's hard, I know
Oh, I would know
Track Name: Getting Used To It
I don't have the energy
To respond to what you said to me
Chaotic as it all may seem
Underneath it all I am at peace
So what do you expect me to say?

I just can't pretend that I know you like I used to
So many things have changed and I'm
Still just getting used to it
I'm still just getting used to it

I won't hold a grudge (get over it)
I can be above this (get over it)
I'm counting turtle doves at night (let go of it)
To avoid the darkness (let go of)
To let go of all my strife with you

You and me don't have to see
Eye to eye on everything
But at the very least
I have respect for your autonomy

And I just can't pretend that I know you like I used to
So many things have changed and I'm
Still just getting used to it
I'm still just getting used to it

I never did you wrong (get over it)
That's why you're in this song now (get over it)
So that I can move on (let go of it)
And do what you didn't know how (let go of)
Let go of my whole life with you.
Track Name: Mama, Mama
Mama, mama, mama
Half my blood is always yours,
But the dirt of age has clogged my heart and pores

Mama, mama, mama
I don't treat you like I should
Am I the son you'd choose if you could?

Mama, mama, mama
If I'm angry, if I'm lonely
You still love me, you still own me

Though mama, mama, mama
My eyes are vague and distant to you
As distant as the eyes within the man within the moon

But mama, mama, mama
My heart is close and honest with you
Closer than my body was for nine months deep within you

Mama! Mama, mama, mama
Somehow I can always seem to make you proud
By singing all the words that I could never say out loud
I put a tune to all love and hate I have for everything
Oh what a knack I seem to have for love and hate
And for plucking metal strings

But mama, mama, mama
For you I have only one thing
There's no hatred, only loving

And mama, mama, mama
This song could be never ending,
But it ends here with fractured statements worthier of mending

And why is this the fastest song that I have ever written?
Track Name: Ockham's Razor
I was in the middle of
The least compelling nightmare
A face is fleeting…
A sound repeating…

Come on baby, it's still early,
Don't get out of bed yet
Just disarm
That alarm

(Take your time…)
After all it's nothing but a Möbius strip
(To unwind)
The past and future have got you in splits,
And in the end aren't they one in the same?

For there's nowhere to depart from,
Nowhere to arrive
And though I've nothing to compare to,
It's good to be alive.

Standing in the mirror
All alone can be a dark thing:
Who's home?
(Who wants to know?)
Who wants to know?
(Who’s home?)

But if I chase my tail forever
I prove only one thing:
It’s time to throw
Myself a bone

(What do you do...)
When Ockham's razor doesn't quite cut it?
(Do you choose…)
What you believe, or do you run from it?
In the end aren't they one in the same?

For there is nowhere to depart from,
Nowhere to arrive
And though I've nothing to compare to,
It's good to be alive

Nowhere to depart from,
Nowhere to arrive
And though I’ve nothing to compare to,
It’s good to be alive
Track Name: What a Picnic!
An element of surprise
Streaming from the corners of my widow's eyes,
Blowing through the chambers of my heart into a heavy sigh.

Served three years in the Philippines
When I was only eighteen,
Flipping vinyl for the navy
Thirty-five to take a wife, to build a life and a family

Six short years of retirement,
Seeing every penny spent on medical and mortgages
Racking up a load of debt
Before I get a chance to pay for it

Where am I in all of this?
I never had control to begin with.

Look, there I am
Blackened blue my gamma rays
Oh how my thinning days
Been paced away in shallow blinks,
In kitchen sinks, in needle plays

But now, there I am
swollen white; a leukocyte in lymph node buds.
I'm caught between the lumbar stacks;
A lit wick in candle wax

Parsing cells in mantel shelves,
Breathing green-grey hyphae
Through skin of cellophane,
Spread in chiral bread loves,
Caged in marrow boughs...

What a picnic it has been! What a picnic!

I'm lobbing to and fro
Between my own mnemonic lobes
Through midday tennis sets,
And muddy service training nets,
Through morning cigarettes
Porched on gypsum sunsets,
The longest love in post-vignettes,
And more to come in couplets...
How much there is to see
Beyond this fondly dissipating cortex.